Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Required Classes Taught By Trained Apes

So as a county employee I am required to appear for certain training classes. These classes range from the useful (CPR/First Aid) to those best termed as a questionable use of time (Customer Service in the Public Sector, Cultural Diversity), to those I consider "it seemed like a good idea at the time but was horribly staffed and thus is a gargantuan waste of 4 hours."

Which brings me to the defensive driving class I had today.

The instructor apparently spent over 20 years as a police officer in Indiana before moving to Florida and working for the county here. So he's talking about accidents he has investigated and he kept talking about the Coalition of Friction. At least 20 times in 2 minutes he said "the coalition" or "coalition of friction". I don't know if he really thought he was using the correct term or if he was seeing if anyone would correct him.

Meanwhile I am beaming lasers from my eyes into his forehead, willing him to say coefficient.

[furrowing brow]